New People, Same Drama

It took me a while to realize it, but the drama has returned. At BCC, the drama never fades. Even if the people who create it leave, it still hovers around. The worse part about it is that I'm starting to get sucked into it again. There was a time when I found the drama entertaining. But, ever since going to Cortland, I've gotten used to not being around it as much. Now, I'm back at BCC. The drama's still here. I've said that I'm not perfect countless of times. I know that sometimes without meaning to, I can cause drama. However, I always try to clean up after myself. Why can't people just grow up? The main person responsible for most of the drama around here is Bridgette. Even when she's not here, she still creates drama. I'm still kicking myself for sticking up for her back in 2006. I should've just let my friends keep on harrassing her. Instead, I screamed at them and made a stand. They backed down, but Bridgette remained being Bridgette. At the last party over at Danny's, I made a poor comment directed at Cody and Kelcie. Although, I wasn't serious, it still had an impact on them. I apologized to both of them and we're fine now, but when I talked to Kelcie, I told her about my past conversations with Denna. Denna's been in one of her moods, lately. She mentioned that someone told her that Kelcie didn't really like her and was only nice to her in person. I didn't get a name out of her, but Kelcie had an idea of who it was. "It's Bridgette! She must've told Denna that!" she screamed in rage. The part about it is that it's not true. Kelcie really is Denna's friend. Although I can't prove that Bridgette really said that to Denna, it does make sense. Back in the summer, Denna called me, because Bridgette found out about the stuff we were doing. Bridgette wanted her to tell Dan and Chris, because "Chris has always wanted to put me in my place." I called those guys up immediately. I knew better than to believe Bridgette, but I still had to let those guys know that they are and always will be my boys. When I told Chris what Bridgette had said, he got very pissed. Bridgette tried to drive a wedge between the three of us. Obviously, it had failed. Still, she tried to turn my friends against me. So, it wouldn't surprise me if she was doing the same thing to Kelcie. However, Kelcie happens to be a girl and she can break Bridgette in half. Kelcie started to ask me to do impossible things for her at Cody's birthday party. Things like hold Cody back while her and her friend Clarissa jump Bridgette. I told her that there was no way in hell that I could do that. Bridgette deserves anything she gets, but there'll be a time and a place for it. Violence is pointless. If Kelcie really wants vengeance, she should find a more satisfactory way. I already talked to Dan and Chris about it. I told them to help me make sure nothing went down on Saturday IF Bridgette should show up at the party. I don't even know if she's coming or not. Hopefully, she won't be there. Today, I was hanging out with Dan when a girl that I'm not familiar with, came over and gave him a hug. It turns out that this girl has a crush on Dan. For some reason unknown to me, he says that he's not ready for a relationship. I don't see what the problem is. She's a nice girl. Again, I can predict what will happen if Dan doesn't snap out of it. He'll finally be ready for a relationship with her and it'll be too late. She'll be dating someone else that's a complete asshole. It's happened to me, it's happened to Chris, it's happened to all of us. It's not a good feeling. In fact, it's probably the worst pain I've ever felt. But, it's up to him. It's just that he doesn't deserve that pain. When I talked to Denna on Tuesday, we reminisced about how things were last spring. Both of us wanna go back. There'd be some minor changes. I'd probably have "officially" hooked up with Denna. I wouldn't have gone to work at that stupid camp. I'd have gotten my degree at BCC and I wouldn't have screwed up in Cortland. I would've worked with my dad over the summer. I'm sure there would've been some problems, but things would've been a little better. However, things are what they are. If things were different, I'd probably not have known about the stuff with Kara. I sure as hell wouldn't have been put in the International dorm at Cortland, so I'd have never met Joe or Kristi. Things are a bit rough, right now. But, things could've been worse and I'm sure there's a reason why things happened the way they did. Things are slowly getting better. I just have to be patient. Soon, I'll be back on top again.

Hard Times

Things haven't really improved much. In fact, things have gotten worse. My dad found out about my academic suspension. As a result, he gave me the whole "disappointed" speech and suggested my best course of action. Not only that, but paying for college has just gotten harder. I can't remember things ever being this bad. I've been in some tight spots before, but this one's been the worst. I honestly don't know how I'm gonna bounce back from this, right now. It's time that I swallowed my pride and admit that I need help. Unfortunately, asking for dad's help is out of the question. I may have to talk to the counselors at BCC, this week. There are some high points. When I came back to BCC, several of my lady friends pounced on me when they saw me. Then, I got to hang out with Dan and Chris. It seems like it's been forever, since I got to hang out with those guys. Last year, I hung out with Dan and Chris. They've always been there. Nate made a comment, today. He said that getting Dan and Chris to fight my battles was a pussy move. He just doesn't get it. Dan and Chris don't fight my battles for me. We fight our battle TOGETHER! If you mess with one of us, you mess with all of us. My prediction is that before the semester is over, Nate and I will come to blows. Denna's coming back and I know Nate'll try something. When he does, the three of us will be there to stop him. I've noticed that ever since coming back home, any problems that have been going on, have faded away. Cody and Kelcie almost broke up over Christmas and things were getting rocky between them. Then, I came home and started hanging out with them. Things have improved greatly between them. Everything just seems brighter. I just wish this dark cloud that looms over me would fade in the background. It's hard to have a positive perspective on all of this. Hopefully, my friends will be able to keep my morale up. The night's darkest before the dawn.

New Years Day 2009.

I've been home for a few weeks now. A lot has gone on. I'll start with all that's been happening with me. Due to a lot of factors that I don't feel like getting into at this point, I'm not going back to Cortland. Tomorrow, I'm gonna re-transfer to BCC. I made a lot of stupid decisions, this year. Most them have already came back to bite me in the ass. As much as I loved it at Cortland, it feels right for me to go back to BCC. I have unfinished business over there. I can finally get my associates' degree. Also, I'll have more time to hang out with my friends. Stacey's leaving New York in March, so it'll be great to be able to spend a couple more days with her until then. Steph's coming home in 12 days and she owes me a day to hang out. Denna and I straightened things out, so the bitterness has left me. She's coming back to New York for a while. I haven't really hung out with the people that I wanted yet, but there'll be plenty of time. I have hung out with Seth, Danny, Cody, and Kelcie. Kelcie and I talked over the phone a couple days ago. She's really upset at the fact that Bridgette's back in New York and keeps on calling Cody. She's even more upset at the fact that Cody defends Bridgette. I can see where she's coming from along with everyone else. She's voiced her concerns to me, Jay, and Danny. Kelcie asked me a question that caught me off guard. She asked me if Cody ever cheated on her, could she cheat on him with me. I told her that I'd get back to her on that one. She says that she didn't mean it. She said she was joking, but I'm not so sure about that. Kelcie's a beautiful girl and Denna was originally trying to hook her up with me. But, I couldn't do that to Cody. He may be making some stupid decisions, but I wouldn't be able to do that. I'm not sure if I would've been next in line if Kelcie wasn't dating Cody. Still, they're both good friends of mine. This week, I'm at Seth's place. On Tuesday, we watched an episode of that Double Shot of Love reality show. It's just as bad as when Tila Tequila was the host. This time, there's two twins that are both looking for love. Again, it's pathetic and of course I'll be tuning in next Tuesday. Last night, was New Year's Eve. We had a small party at Seth's again. His brother Aaron got drunk and threw all the party snacks at me. It's been a while since Aaron's gotten that drunk. Today has been boring. Tomorrow, Seth and I are gonna do something to make up for the fact that he couldn't do anything for his birthday, today. We don't know what yet, but our morning's pretty booked. As far as my resolution's concerned, it's pretty simple. My resolution for 2009 is to work out and get in shape. It's about time I worked on my image a bit more. Who knows? It could go a long way. 2008 was a pretty good year. Hopefully, 2009 will be even better.