The Past , The Present, The Future

Things aren't getting any better. In fact, things are getting progessively worse. My relationship with my father isn't going very well. I'm still out of a job and long friendships are ending. The week I spent in Candor was the second to last one. The next time I go to Candor, I'm grabbing my stuff and I'm never going back. Last weeekend, wasn't that great. I stayed home for the majority of it. I only left the house on Saturday to go to the ECPW show. The new place that they had it was cold as hell. They're never having it there again. Sunday, I went to a baseball game with my dad and my uncles. We had been drinking. I'm suspecting that one of my uncles is cheating on my aunt, but I don't have solid proof. It looks that way, though. On the way home, my dad said something that triggered an emotional reaction inside me. We didn't exactly have the greatest conversation. He had been drinking too, but I think I was more out of it than he was. Both of us said things that we didn't mean. Between crying, puking, and cursing him out, I think it's safe to say that I've had better Sunday afternoons. Him and I are fine now. We both apologized and acknowledged that it was the alcohol that caused both of us to lash out. I understand where he's coming from and I appreciate that. Everybody wants the best for their kids. I know I can be better, but before I get into that, I'll get into the other events that have happened. Last Saturday, Seth and I went to his dad's 50th birthday party. That wasn't too bad. Then, we picked up Danny and went to my cousin's party before he was sent to Iraq. That wasn't too bad either. However, my dad did something that I thought was uncalled for. He shook Seth's hand as we were leaving, but refused to shake mine. The reason why this was a big deal is due to the fact that he can't stand Seth or his family. That came up in our emotional conversation on Sunday. Well, he wasn't really emotional...I was though. I understand his reasoning now, but at the time, I thought it was uncalled for. Then, I was SUPPOSED TO watch UFC 100 with Danny and Seth. Kelcie and Mike Sisin called me. They invited me to the cabin. Well, Danny and Seth were giving me a hard time about it. Eventually, Danny stopped and everything was fine. Seth on the other hand, was being an asshole. He said that if I went, he wasn't taking Kelcie with him and his family to Warped Tour. Basically, it's a three-day concert. He'd been promising her this for months. The real reason why he didn't wanna take her, was because of Mandy. She was giving him a hard time about taking Kelcie instead of her. Basically, she was manipulating him again and like the pathetic worm that he is, he was giving in. So, it had nothing to do with me. He was just making it seem like he was punishing her. Because of his attitude, I chose to go to the cabin with Mike and Kelcie. For the most part, it was the better choice with a few exceptions to some of the events that occurred that night. If I had to go back and choose again, I'd still go with my first choice. Then, he changed his mind and said she could go. However, she needed to pay $40 for the ticket. He was supposed to pay for her ticket. He promised her. I was gonna do it for her, but then the price was raised to $80 for the camp site. So, she couldn't go because of all that. Then, she called me up crying about that asshole, Cody and I finally had enough. I told her to move on. That got her annoyed at me. I just fixed that, now. Both her and Mike think I should've just kept that one to myself, but I stick with what I said. I truly feel that she needs to move on from him, because he's no better than Seth. So, because the son of a bitch has stabbed me in the back earlier this year and he pulled an asshole stunt like that to Kelcie, I'm grabbing my stuff from his place at some point, and I'm done with his ass. He's a stupid, selfish, immature, good for nothing, scumbag. My friends never liked hanging out with him. The only reason that I hung out with that idiot for as long as I did, was because his family wasn't anything like him and treated me like gold. The other reason was that I thought that maybe he'd get his head out of his ass and change. I was wrong. So, I lost two friends, this year. They're small losses, so I'm not too broken up about it. Of course, there'll be people talking. They'll say that I did it just so I could get with Kelcie. They'll say that she manipulated me into hating them. Let me just set it straight. Seth screwed Seth and Cody's responsible for the destruction of our friendship. He hurt that girl badly and I can't hang out with someone like that. Kelcie and I will never be a couple. We're just really good friends. If people see me as the bad guy, then so be it. Now, onto how things used to be. I've been thinking about how things were so much better a few years ago. 2007 seemed to be the golden year for me. I had good friends, I was working with my dad making good money, my grades weren't bad. It was just my year. 2008 wasn't too bad either. I look at how things were, then I look at them now. I'm pretty-much at the bottom. I remember when my parents compared me to Seth earlier, this year. Here's a guy that has a job and car, but nobody really wants to hang around him. Then, there's me. No job, no car, but everyone wants to hang out with me. My parents didn't see it that way. They still thought he was a loser, but they thought he was more on the ball than I was. I laughed at that. I may not have a job or a car at the moment, but someday I will. I don't think I've done half bad for a guy that doesn't have a job or a car. When Seth liked Kelcie and tried to blow past me to get with her, I rose to the occassion. I took her out to dinner twice, I took her to the movies, I danced with her at Danny's sister's party, and I had no job and no car. She always came to me. At his place, she'd cuddle with me on the couch and he'd just sit there like an idiot. Then, Mandy entered the picture again. Well, I didn't want Mandy, but he did. Yet, he was trying to get with Kelcie, so he'd invite her to all these things. When Mandy came around, he tried to cut Kelcie out of the picture, so he could get with Mandy. Here's the amusing part. I talked to Mandy about that. She only has some interest and she's not rushing into anything. Basically, Seth's gonna be her bitch. I'll admit that I'm not perfect. I'll even admit that I'm not as good as I was two years ago. But, I'll be better than I ever was. Give me two more weeks and I'll be back on top. I'm getting rid of all the losers that I've hung out with. I'll restore my confidence in myself. I'll pay the people I owe. I'll continue to focus on my goals. I might not be much right now, but it's still early yet. I'm gonna be better than ever. As for UFC 100, it wasn't a bad Pay Per View, but it wasn't a good one either. Dan Henderson knocked out Mike Bisping. Brock Lesnar knocked out Frank Mir. As far as I'm concerned, it couldn't happen to a nicer guy.