Reminiscing

Things are starting to calm down a bit around here. With the exception of Monday, the week wasn't that bad. Then again, I didn't hang out at BCC that much, so that could have something to do with it. I haven't talked to Kelcie, since she called me on Sunday. Dan and Chris wanted to talk to her, but I told them not to worry about it. They didn't want Bridgette to break up my friendship with her, but she didn't. Kelcie chose to end it herself. Depending on how this week goes, I might call her up and settle things. Worse case scenario, I'll make sure I get the last word. Friday, after Seth got out of work, we went over to The Beef to hang out with Danny. That was actually a smart move. Cody wanted us to go to the hooka bar, but we'd have to pick up Bridgette on the way. Seth didn't want her in his car, so I told Cody he was too tired to go anywhere. One of Danny's co-workers, Joe called up a lady friend of his. She told him that she was bringing three of her friends with her. He turned to me and said, "I only need one of them, so play it cool." I thought that was freakin' awesome. I'm used to these freakin' guys surrounded by a group of girls and they're usually unwilling to share. Joe has his priorities in order. He knows that he only needs one girl to be happy. When they came, I talked to one of them. Her name's Jane, she goes to Binghamton University. Unfortunately, they didn't stay long, but Joe works with Danny, so I'm not worried about not seeing them again. Saturday, was gonna be the big Mardi Gras party. Key word in that sentence is "was". Danny left his girlfriend, Jay in charge of that party. Jay doesn't really know how to plan a party, so there was a drunk annoying guy, a pregnant girl with her black boyfriend, and Seth and me. Seth and I left around midnight. I called Danny when we got home, because I was bored AND I wanted to find out if any girls managed to show up. "No, everybody left," he replied. We talked about how disappointing the party was and then I told Danny about the parties at Camp that I hosted. Danny said those were the kind of parties that he wanted. I wish Danny could've made those parties. For one thing, nobody would've messed with me if Danny were there. Nothing would've been broken and I'd still have had $200 in my wallet. As I was reminiscing about the parties at Camp, it came to me that I really did enjoy myself, last summer. Sure, the job wasn't exactly a barrel of laughs and I missed my boys back home, but at the end of the day, those same people that I worked with were in the same boat that I was in. I wouldn't go as far as say we were a second family, but we made the best of it. I miss anybody from Australia. They were just awesome. Especially, Matt and Erin. I think I was Erin's favorite. Matt would tell me that Erin always asked how I was doing. She was great. My other favorite was Meagan from Scotland. Her and I were gonna hang out at the place I was staying, but that never happened. I have a feeling that she'll work at the camp again, because last year was her second year working there. I do plan on visiting the camp a couple times, this summer. But, I have no intention of working there again. Before going to Danny's, I took a long walk. I had a lot of things on my mind. Mostly, Denna was on my mind. I found out on Friday that she was leaving early Saturday morning to go back to Kansas. If I had known she was leaving sooner, I'd have made an effort to hang out with her during the week. As I've said before, I have a few journals from high school. My journal from 9th grade is filled with pages about wrestling. Wrestling, wrestling, wrestling, my girlfriend, wrestling, my girlfriend, wrestling wrestling, wrestling. Then, my 2006 journal AND my old livejournal online is filled with Ashley. Ashley, Ashley, Ashley, Ashley. That's all it is. I've read this one a few times. Now, I discovered a pattern. This one's filled with things about Denna. Denna, Denna, Denna, Denna. Yeah sure, there's other stuff in here as well, but from 2008 to about now, it's been all Denna. I've been thinking of why I didn't tell her about everything a year ago. Last night, I realized why. I thought that I had already lost. My spirit was broken. So, I just let her go. I felt used, so I just let her go. 2008 was definitely my year. My favorite football team, the Giants won the superbowl, Undertaker won the World Heavyweight Championship at Wrestlemania, my bank account was the best it's ever been, and Denna came into my life. I wasn't alone in 2008, because she was there. Almost immediately after meeting me, she met my friends and she was accepted. This all happened before her moronic husband entered the picture. The second or third day we hung out, we were flirting with each other. I knew she liked me and I'm pretty sure she knew that I liked her. I remember everybody was to leave the BCC Campus due to a big snow storm heading our way. I had to take the bus. Bridgette and Denna had to take the bus as well. I really didn't like Bridgette back then and I guess my facial expressions showed it. Denna noticed and playfully poked my side. That started a poking/tickling war. Later, she called me and said she did that to distract me. She could tell that Bridgette was getting on my nerves, so she distracted me. That's when I realized that there was some kind of attraction there. I don't know what it is about her. I can remember every moment and every word we've shared. Not only that, but I remember the scent of her perfume (cologne actually), the way she looked at me, the way she'd gently brush her hand on my cheek. There's an old saying. You don't know what you have until it's gone. That was the case with Ashley. With Denna, I knew exactly what I had. I had learned the first time with Ashley. So, when I was walking, I was thinking about everything. One thing that I've learned is that in some cases, there's no such thing as "too late." Hell, there is no tomorrow. So, I'm going to tell Denna everything. I'm gonna prove to her that I'm better than her worthless husband. Also, I'm gonna prove to her that I'm the path to her being happy, because I don't think she's happy, right now. She seemed happier, here in Binghamton. Where all her friends and family are. Where I am. I think she'd be happier with me, because last year, she was happy with me. She did ask me to keep in touch with Cory, which I had already planned on doing. That was her way of asking me to look after him. That's no problem. My mission is to get things back to the way they were. I'm gonna make things go back to the way they should be. I know talk is cheap and actions speak louder than words. It's about time I took action.